What Do I Make?

This. This is what I make.

A difference.

Today in Kindergarten

I:

• was told that our field trip (in May) to the zoo should happen, "RIGHT now. or ELSE, teacher."
• sent a child to the principal for using the f-word.
• taught my kids that "supercallifragilisticexpialadocious" is a real word. And they can say it, too.
• got another shoe thrown at me.
• told a girl that she is no longer allowed to use glue in kindergarten because she was EATING it. Gross.
• told another girl she couldn't flip off someone just cause they "really pissed me off, teacher!"
• told two boys that they could NOT compare belly buttons by unbuttoning their pants.
• was told, "My baby sister Effie is here now and she cries so much teacher but I love her so much and Mom says I can help take care of her but I don't want to change her yucky diaper I just want to feed her her bottle is that OK?" (yes..that was one sentence)
• sent another child to time out because he was throwing blocks at another child.
• said "I have HAD IT today!!! Don't push me!" at least 5 times. 
• gave the teacher look of death at least 100 million times.
• showed the COOLEST video of caterpillar/butterfly metamorphosis.
• tied a bajillion shoelaces.
• tried not to raise my voice (and failed a couple times).
• told my morning class that their bladders are not connected. No one else is using the bathroom for at least 15 minutes, because you do not have to go at the same time!
• told a boy, "No you may not use the bathroom. Why? Because you don't have to go - you're just bored."
• Got 12 hugs from Dylan (he counted. Sweetheart)
• Took many, many, many deep, calming breaths.
• Smiled. A couple times, at least.
•  was told that a little boy used "the z word, teacher!!" I still have no clue what word the "z-word" is. 
• Heard a girl call someone else "a total meanie-poopy-diaper-spaghetti head!" Interesting choice of insults.

All this in ONE DAY.

I think it's time for Spring Break!!

Things I Never Thought I'd Say: Kindergarten Edition

Your nose is not an all-you-can-eat buffet.

No, you may not dig in the trash for chocolate.

No, the leprechauns did not make you cut your hair with the scissors!!

Why do you have to miss recess? Because you poured glue all over your cubby when I wasn't looking.

Swearing in Spanish is the same thing as swearing in English. Yes you will get sent to Mr. Benson's office.

Your snot does not need to be colorful. Take the crayons out of your nose.




Seriously. This is just in my afternoon class!!! Kindergarten is nuts!